Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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