she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
25 Men Talk About the First Time They Went Down On A Woman
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
23 Ex Fraternity Brothers & Sorority Sisters Confess Their Most Insane Stories
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.