No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize