Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
