so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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