Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
