I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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