Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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