Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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