I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
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