You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Randomize
