Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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