his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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