Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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