One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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