just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
