so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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