He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
