why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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