i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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