i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
