Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
