I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
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I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
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Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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