could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
