my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize