it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
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