What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
