I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
