There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
