Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
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