Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I pour the whiskey from now on
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize