dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
