I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Randomize
