He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
There are leaves in my underwear?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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