Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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