Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Randomize
