Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
