i jhust puked up my retainher.
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
