Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
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