your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
