What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
