Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
