should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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