I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Randomize
