Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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