You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
