At least make sure they are 18
Why
Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
