My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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