To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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