you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
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