Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
hell yes lets make some ravioli
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize